When I was pregnant with my first child, I decided I would keep working. My job as a writer/editor enabled me to work from home, and, while it didn’t pay a lot, it did provide decent insurance coverage for my family. My husband, then an independent contractor, also worked from home. Our ability to work where we wanted and flexible schedules, in theory, gave us the perfect scenario for keeping our jobs while raising our children.
Before my baby was born, I arranged, what I thought at the time, was a pretty sweet setup. I would work from home four days a week and come in to the office for one. I could be at home with my child and still work. On those days I had to be in the office, my husband could take care of the baby. What kick-ass parents we would be. Killing it in the workforce and as parents.
On March 8, thousands (millions?) of women will forego working in support of “A Day Without Women,” a protest organized by those behind the Women’s March on Washington.
The organizers are well-meaning, but what’s that they say about “good intentions?”
According to the organizers’ website, women can participate in one or all of the following ways:
Taking off from work (paid or unpaid)
Only shopping at small, women- and minority-owned businesses
With the exception of option three (unless red just really isn’t in your color wheel), if you are someone, like me, who is a full-time caregiver for your small children, “taking off” simply isn’t possible. Continue reading →
My family spends much of our day outside, mostly to keep our two boys from climbing off the walls. On those days when the weather is too gross to be outdoors, I often turn to engaging experiments and projects to pass the time.
You don’t need much to spark the little scientist in your kid: just some objects you have around the house and some curiosity does the trick.
I love my children unconditionally. I imagine most parents and other caregivers would agree our children could do very little to lose our affection. They will test us, absolutely, but, we will remain steadfast in our devotion.
Our children earned our love the moment they entered our lives. They owe us nothing. They need not prove a single thing. We chose them. Whether by birth, adoption, or act of faith or circumstance. We asked for them, and they answered. We owe them our love.
Hey, you! Yes, you with the beautiful round belly. I see you shuffling along, tugging at the waist of your maternity jeans, wondering how you could possibly ever fit into your normal clothes again. I see you hunched over in your chair, trying to make your belly look a bit smaller because it is so much bigger than your friend’s who is a month ahead in her pregnancy.
Do you know how sexy you are? And not in the creepy, depths of the Internet fetish kind of sexy. I’m talking full on, goddess, make the Earth shift with every movement sexy. Do you know that’s what you are? Do you know you drip with marvelous, soul-moving desire? Continue reading →
Another year immersing myself in the world of parenting, both real and virtual, is drawing closer to an end. I thought about what I might want for the coming year, and my answers, I am sure, are similar to your own. I hope for continued health, happiness and prosperity for my family. I hope I keep finding the strength to handle the difficulties of motherhood and the sense to appreciate the beauty of the small details. I will strive to be the best parent I can be for my family, as I know you will as well. In order to do that, can we please agree that, we in this great community called parenthood, could use some resolutions?
Our lives may be different now. Your priority might be your career, your partner, your desire for travel or caring for your pets. While I may be entrenched in diapers and kindergarten registration, you may be building your dream home or calculating your next job move. Our lives may be different, and they both matter.
I want you to know that even though I try not to talk incessantly about my children, I still appreciate how much interest you show in them. I love how you ask to see pictures and are genuinely enthused with how much they have grown. I apologize if I don’t always give your life’s journey the same attention. I will do better to ask you more questions and listen to your triumphs and struggles. Continue reading →