Category Archives: Think

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Leading authority offers parents life-saving advice on suicide prevention and awareness

Earlier this month, I was privileged to have an insightful conversation with Dr. Stacey Freedanthal, Ph.D, LCSW, a sought-after expert on understanding suicide and the author of  Loving Someone with Suicidal Thoughts: What Family, Friends, and Partners Can Say and do.

During our talk, which aired live on Facebook, Dr. Freedanthal provided valuable tools for recognizing signs of depression, anxiety and other mental health issues in our children. She also encouraged parents and caregivers to establish an open dialogue with their children that enables them to feel seen and heard.

Here are some of my top takeaways from our conversation.

Keep guns out of the home. Easy access to firearms is a leading cause of deaths by suicide, increasingly among young people.

Talk to your kids, or find them a trusted adult they feel comfortable with enough to share their concerns, worries and feelings with. This may include a fellow family member, a mental health professional or a combination of several individuals.

Let your child know they will not be judged or blamed if they have suicidal thoughts or are thinking of harming themselves. Too often, children won’t speak up because they are scared of getting in trouble or letting their family down.

Be mindful of how you speak about suicide. Children take in what we say, and if they hear us referring to someone who committed or attempted suicide as selfish or attention-seeking, they may not feel OK coming to us if they are considering ending their own lives.

Understand help is available. 988, the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline is an excellent resource not only for immediate help for those in a critical state, but for those who are concerned for a loved one.

Keep talking. Though it may seem counterintuitive talking to your kids about suicide, and even asking them if they ever think about ending their lives, won’t cause them to want to commit suicide. Instead this will let them know they are encouraged to share what’s on their mind and know they are supported.

If you would like to watch the full, edited interview, please click on the image below to watch the video on YouTube.

assorted color heart shaped candies

It’s OK if you don’t want to get your kids stuff for Valentine’s Day

Every year on Valentine’s Day, my dad would buy my mom box of chocolates. My siblings and I were grateful for any our mother would share, knowing full well those were her chocolates.

After all, at least as we understood it, Valentine’s Day was a holiday for grown-ups, and more specifically, for grown-ups in a relationship.

We weren’t showered with candy and gifts, because the holiday wasn’t about us.

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How to cope with broken resolutions and the mid-January slump

Before reading further, be advised I am not a professional in the field of mental health, and what I share here should never replace the services provided by someone who is trained to help those who struggle with depression, suicidal thoughts, anxiety or other mental health issues.

January is a difficult month for many people. We come in at the start full of excitement and hope, determined to accomplish our goals, only to find by the middle of the month, we have already failed to follow through on our resolutions. Add to that feeling of dejection days of minimal sunlight, and, for some, seasonal depression.

Yes, January can be tough. However, January can also be freeing and satisfying. As a person born in January, this month holds deep meaning for me, and I hope the ideas shared below serve you well in the coming weeks and beyond.

Reassess Those Resolutions

Many of us use the upcoming year to make resolutions and set intentions for ourselves. After sticking with them for a few days, often we fail to keep following through. For example, you may have gone in to 2023 determined to run three miles a day, and after a week, you found yourself lacing up your running shoes less and less. You may feel angry, disappointed and frustrated at your failure to follow through. All of these are valid feelings. Failing to stick with a resolution, especially so early on in the year can be such a blow to our egos, many of us see little point in even trying again.

There is a point, and being able to come back to something like running or learning a language or volunteering more is admirable. Yet, when we approach these goals the same way we always have, chances are, we will struggle once more. We tend to believe we need to think big, when thinking small, that is setting tiny, easily attainable goals is a better path toward success.

I first came across this idea of setting small goals when listening to James Clear, author of Atomic Habits on Brene Brown’s “Dare To Lead” podcast. He shared an example of someone’s goal of simply driving to the gym (I believe once a week). Did this person go in the gym at first, no, but the small, repeated habit of just getting there set the stage for them to do so. Even driving might be too much, it could just be the simple act of packing a gym bag one day a week. The point is, even if you “failed” to follow through on those resolutions, you can try again by giving yourself simpler and more attainable goals.

Celebrate The Small Wins

After the past few years we have been through, I believe we all deserve a lot of love and grace for getting to this moment. For many of us, the pandemic has left us with an overwhelming question of “what am I doing with my life?” We feel pressured to make big changes and “correct” areas of our lives.

Pandemic or not, any moment any of us can say I am here, I am alive, I am present is worth celebrating. For some, this could just mean getting out of bed and getting dressed in the morning. For others, it might mean taking a walk around the block. For others, it could just mean spending a minute in front of a mirror brushing their hair. These little moments are huge, and should be celebrated.

Focus On The Present

January tends to be a time of looking ahead. I am guilty of using this time of year to obsess over summer plans and other happenings long in the future. While, planning ahead is necessary at times, and there is nothing wrong with thinking about the future, I know the idea can be stressful.

I find taking the time to be mindful of where I am and what I am doing to be centering and gives me the focus I need to take on more challenging tasks. If you find yourself spiraling into worry, you might find this tip I learned from my therapist helpful. Wherever you are, take a few moments to play a game of “I Spy” (yup the game you play with your kids). By focusing on items in our current space, we can calm our minds and center ourselves.

Remember Even Those “Lost” Days Have Value

I have many days where I intend to check a bunch of items off of my to do list, but my mood, extenuating circumstances or other unexpected things pull me off course, and I am left at the end of the day wondering what I did with my time.

For many of us, we feel like we need tangible evidence of a productive day. This could mean cleaning out our inbox, scheduling doctors’ appointments, putting away laundry and other tasks on our to-do lists. When we have those days where it feels like nothing got done, it can be devastating. However, those “nothing” days are important. Sometimes, we go into them with intention, purposely committing to avoiding most tasks in order to recharge, and sometimes we just find our bodies and minds need a rest and have to cancel plans or put off our task list for a day. Taking care of ourselves, in whatever way that means, isn’t being lazy or self-indulgent, it is vital for living a healthy life.

As I said in the beginning of this post, I am no expert, and I often fail to heed my own advice. I wrote this as much as a guide for myself as anyone else. If you leave with anything, know you are incredible as you are and that every day is a new opportunity.

blue bright lights

I asked ChatGPT to help me write a blog post

AI-generated content is becoming more prevalent as individuals and businesses alike look for ways to streamline their creative processes. As a writer, I am both nervous and intrigued by the possibilities of AI. From a creative workers’ perspective, I worry companies looking to cut costs will use AI as an easy and cheap way to mass produce content. From a broader human perspective, I am curious about how AI can be used to diversify content and enable more people to be in this space.

While many AI content tools exist, they aren’t free or for public use. OpenAI, however, has launched a free program, ChatGPT, which generates responses to questions and commands posed by users.

I decided to put the tool to the test by asking a series of questions that could help me produce an informative blog post on whether my fifth grader needs a smartphone. If you follow my blog, you may recall, I already wrote about this topic, and if you want to read that post for comparison, you can do so here.

Please note that up to and including this paragraph has been written by me. I use italics to differentiate the AI-generated portions below.

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person holding and taking selfie using a smartphone

Does my fifth grader “need” a smartphone?

My oldest will soon be 10 years old, and, with each year, he is becoming one of fewer and fewer kids his age with their own phone. He has known children with smartphones since he was in Kindergarten, and has expressed interest in one ever since.

Before he was nine, I wouldn’t even address the question of getting him a phone. I believe (and still do), he had no valid reason for having one, and trusted that he was always with a reliable individual (whether a teacher, relative or activity leader), who had access to a phone and my information should he ever be in trouble.

Still, I understand the desire to want to enable our kids to be able to reach us if/when they are in trouble or scared. My son is growing more independent, and if a phone could help ease some of my worries and allow him to do more on his own, it may not be a terrible solution.

This thought occurred to me last month, when my son wanted to march in our town’s Homecoming Parade with the Middle School. When I dropped him off, there was no clear adult in charge (though there were some present), and it was a loud chaotic mess of teens, floats and excitement.

I hesitated and asked my son if he wanted to stay. He said he did, and though I felt concerned about his welfare, I agreed, got back in my car and drove off to meet my husband and our seven-year-old with whom I’d be watching the parade.

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5 Trick-or-treating etiquette tips to embrace this Halloween

Halloween is fast approaching, and kids everywhere are counting down the days until they can go trick-or-treating. Stocking up on candy and other goodies is a joyous time for lots of children, however, unfortunately that fun can be spoiled by bad behavior from kids AND adults.

I won’t say my own kids are perfect by any means, and I certainly have observed them engage in some of these problematic actions. Parenting, after all, is an ongoing learning experience. As someone whose family has participated in a massive town trick-or-treating event since my kids’ were little, I have observed a few things which I want to pass on to you.

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Smelly Proof Is A Sustainable Alternative To Single-Use Plastic Bags

I have two kids in school who bring their snacks and lunch to school with them every day. While I do my best to pack their food in sustainable containers, I sometimes find them lacking. Like many “green” products, they are too bulky, too hard to clean or flimsy. I end up giving up and reverting back to unsustainable sandwich bags and other wasteful products.

I wanted a product that got mimic the convenience and ease of the food storage I was accustomed to, while still giving me a eco-friendly alternative to single-use plastic.

Enter Smelly Proof, a brand of storage bags that function better than typical plastic storage bags and are durable, reusable, and FDA approved. The bags are also free of BPA and other harmful materials often found in plastic storage items, and are 100% American made.

Since receiving my samples of Smelly Proof products, I have used them to store everything from produce to cheese, and have found they keep these items fresh for a reasonable amount of time. And unlike traditional plastic bags, the Smelly Proof bags are easily cleaned by hand are even dishwasher safe!

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Should you replace your petroleum jelly with Waxelene?

Like many Americans, petroleum jelly, or as you may know it by its most popular brand name, Vaseline, was a staple in my childhood home. The gooey, greasy, slippery product was a sought-after tool for curing everything from an irritated nose during a cold to healing chapped lips.

As an adult, I continued to use petroleum jelly, finding it helped me with a number of beauty and personal care needs. However, I always felt a bit disturbed by how petroleum jelly gets made, and wondered if this was really the best option for mine and my family’s health.

I was intrigued when I was offered a chance to try out Waxelene, an all-natural, organic alternative to petroleum jelly.

9oz jar of Waxelene


Before I continue, I will note that I have never personally experienced any adverse affects from using petroleum jelly, nor I can I offer any substantiated claims to suggest anyone would be harmed by continuing to use it. This post is meant to give readers insight into an alternative product, which may align more with their needs and preferences. I encourage you to do your own research and make choices that are best for you.

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Make the most of family travel with these 5 packing tips

By Sandra Aris

Spring and summer travel is here, and parents are ready to get kids out of the house and on the road or in the air. But before kicking off their dream vacation, parents are left with the difficult task of packing for everyone in the family. And while it may be as simple as outfits and skincare for adults, packing for kids requires much more preparation, thought, and consideration.

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This Mother’s Day, let’s commit to giving moms the care and protection we deserve

I am writing this just a day after the news broke about the likelihood of the United States Supreme Court overturning Roe v. Wade and bringing the issue of abortion back to the states. What this means is those in need of abortion services will no longer be protected by federal law, and instead their reproductive rights will be at the whim of their state legislature.

For women like me, who live in states like New York, nothing will change. However, for the thousands of women who live in states poised to enact the strictest abortion laws in the country, the overturning of Roe means they may be forced to spend obscene amounts to go out of state for an abortion, resort to unsafe and/or illegal alternatives, or continue a pregnancy they do not want.

As a mother who has carried two children in my womb, I know with a full heart the joy and wonder of bringing life into this world. I do not take this lightly, and I reject anyone who suggests those of us who are pro-choice are callous, uncaring supporters of “baby murder.” It is because of my experience with having a healthy, supported and welcomed pregnancy that I more than ever want to ensure that others have the same.

The ability to choose when to have a child is just part of the bigger picture for ensuring women and mother’s are protected. For those who choose to carry a child, we need to do a far greater job of providing them with comprehensive prenatal and post natal care.

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