Surrogacy, or the process of carrying a child in the womb for someone else, is a fascinating and special service many parents rely on to build their families. And, while there is a lot of content from the perspective of parents who have used surrogate(s) to grow their family, we don’t often hear from the surrogates themselves.
I am fortunate to be friends with Dana Kamp, a fellow boy mom and writer, and one-time surrogate. Dana spoke with me over Instagram about her experience serving as a surrogate, and shared the often emotional story of searching for a match, going through a surrogate pregnancy, and where that relationship with that family is today.
Throughout our conversation, Dana shared valuable information for both potential surrogates and those looking to use surrogacy, and dispelled a few myths about what the experience entails.
Read on to see some of the highlights of our interview and watch the full video below.
Discuss Your Interest In Becoming A Surrogate With Your Partner/Family
Regardless of whether you are in a relationship and/or already have children of your own, surrogacy is a major process, and anyone choosing to become a surrogate should seek out the support of friends and family.
Dana shared how her husband was a huge champion of hers throughout the process and how she involved her older children in many aspects of her surrogacy journey.
Get A Reliable Attorney With Experience In Surrogacy
Surrogacy is a path that requires a lot of trust and faith between multiple parties. Potential parents want to be ensured that the person carrying their child is of sound health and mind, while the potential surrogate wants to be properly financed and cared for throughout the surrogate pregnancy.
Dana spoke about how she chose her attorney based on her track record and experience working with parents who choose surrogacy and surrogates themselves.
Surrogacy Isn’t Simply Finding Someone To Carry Your Baby
Though television and movies may make it seem like finding a surrogate is simply a matter of asking a friend or family member, the reality is, in most cases, families will need to reach out to a service and hopefully be matched with the right partner.
Dana shared how she went through many potential matches until she found one where both parties would be mutually happy. Once she made the connection, she spoke about how she and her husband had a chance to meet the family in person, and left feeling like everyone was on the same page.
As With Any Pregnancy, Their Can Be Complications
While Dana, like many potential surrogates, was cleared for the process because she had four successful pregnancies, her surrogate pregnancy did not go as smoothly.
Dana shared the emotional story of being told her pregnancy may no longer be viable, of going on bed rest, and eventually, going to the hospital several weeks before the baby was due.
Dana was supported in all ways by the family she was working with (another reason to get a quality attorney), and was able to deliver a healthy child to them.
The Relationship Doesn’t (Have To) End Once The Baby Is Born
As mentioned above, every surrogacy partnership is different, and each one needs to determine the relationship they will have.
For Dana and her family, developing a strong connection to the family she was working with was important. She shared how the families are still very close and often checks on the child she helped bring into this world.
To learn more about Dana’s journey, and about the surrogacy process, click on the video below.