Category Archives: Think

Kids understand more than we think

“Why do we have belly buttons?”

My six-year-old asked me, while staring down at his own naval during bathtime.

I explained to him that his belly button is the spot where his umbilical cord connected him to my placenta, which is how he got nutrients inside the womb. I told him how after babies are born, the umbilical cord is cut and what’s left is the belly button.

I went on to talk about how his younger brother’s umbilical cord might not have been cut properly, which is why he got sick when he was born.

We talked about how he had to go to the hospital, and my six-year-old commented on how lucky his brother was to have good doctors working on him, and I agreed.

My son followed up by asking me if doctors still had to help patients even if they didn’t have money. I explained how doctors have a sort of “code” which demands they care for anyone, no matter the circumstances. I told him that afterwards, the hospital or doctor’s office sends a bill saying what is owed to the patient or the patient’s family.

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We talked about how our family fortunate to have the means to pay for his brother’s procedures and NICU stay, and to be financially well enough to afford quality healthcare for our family.

I told my son that some families aren’t so fortunate, and many have to do things like sell their homes, or ask others for help because their medical bills are too expensive.

My son looked at me and asked with the innocence of a child, “Why can’t it just be free?”

I could have just said, “I wish, or, I don’t know,” but I believe our children deserve honest, thoughtful answers. Continue reading

That daily glass could be putting you at risk for breast cancer

Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional, nor am I a scientific expert. This website and its content are not meant to be a substitute for peer-reviewed journalism. My purpose in sharing this article is to raise awareness on the potential risks of alcohol consumption, and while I did my best to ensure the accuracy of the information presented, I am aware that these points can be debated. I welcome your feedback in the comments.

What if I told you that drinking one of these every day could increase your risk of breast cancer by 12 percent? I’m guessing you’d think twice about grabbing another glass. You might even stop drinking it altogether. 

What if I told you that drink was alcohol? Would you still be so keen on giving it up?

When we think of bad habits that cause cancer, we think of smoking, eating poorly or spending too much time in the tanning booth. We criticize those who indulge in a daily cheeseburger, but would never do the same for those who partake in a glass of red wine at the end of a long day. 

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To be clear, I know several women who have breast cancer, I am not applying that they or any other person who has this horrible illness is at fault because they drink alcohol. Several factors contribute to breast cancer risk, including genetics, stress and just plain bad luck.

This article isn’t meant to shame anyone, least of all people with cancer, I am sharing this with the intent to educate and raise questions about “drinking culture,” and what that means for women’s health. Continue reading

Finding magic outside the “Magic Kingdom”

Every few months or so, I mull over the idea of planning a family trip to Disney World. I go online, research the best hotels, compare vacation packages and express my interest in Disney to a chorus of responses from friends who are Disney vacation planners, or know people who are Disney vacation planners.

The process overwhelms me, as I am confronted with the reality of how difficult — and expensive — a Disney World trip can be for families, not to mention how hard visiting the Happiest Place On Earth is for anyone traveling outside a very narrow selection of dates.

So, I table my plans and think, maybe another time, all the while wondering if I am depriving my children of some magical experience they will only appreciate when they are young.

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It doesn’t help that my six-year-old has never been that into Disney or most other “fantasy.” I swear the kid was basically born an adult.

My younger son, however, loves princesses and make believe and all things magical.

He is four, which means soon, he too will have no interest in childhood fantasies.

I often worry I’m depriving him of the opportunity to have his dreams come true.

But, then I think about how magic can come from anywhere.

I am reminded simple joys can mean the world to a child.

On a family trip to Mystic, Conn., we decided to drive about 25 minutes away to watch the Connecticut Tigers, a minor-league affiliate of the Detroit Tigers. Continue reading

All a baby needs is your love (and maybe diapers)

My eyes widened as they caught sight of a beautiful crib, displayed with great care in the middle of the showroom floor.

I, pregnant mom-to-be, and my husband were deep in our shopping for the baby whose arrival was quickly approaching.

I spotted the crib and was enamored with its features:

A built in changing table!

Drawers!

It converts into a toddler bed!

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I was sold. The rational bargain shopper in me, would have insisted on a more simpler (i.e. less expensive option), but I thought, hey, this is an investment. This is something we will use in so many ways, and it will last many years. After all, a baby spends a lot of time sleeping, right?

Turns out, my firstborn spent little time in his crib, and I wound up purchasing a special bassinet which enabled me to safely co-sleep with my baby.

As for the changing table, well, I mostly found it to be a pain, and performed most of my diaper changing on our floor on top of a mat or spare towel.

The drawers did come in handy, and once in a while our child did use the toddler bed, so maybe the crib wasn’t a complete waste.

But could we have done without it?

Yes. Continue reading

What YouTube means for representation

When he was about three years old, my now six-year-old son, discovered YouTube. Like many toddlers and preschoolers, my child would stare in awe as other children un-boxed and played with toys — many of which we had in our very own home, sitting un-played with on a shelf near by.

Maybe it was the comfort of hearing another child’s voice in the home, or the thrill of watching a kid get a new toy, but for whatever reason, my kid just ate this stuff up.

Above all, one YouTube kid kept making his way onto our screen.

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Ryan.

Ryan, the now eight-year-old star of the behemoth YouTube channel, Ryan ToysReview, began making videos with his parents in 2015, and has grown into what may be the biggest child star of my kids’ generation.

What Macaulay Culkin was to the 90s, Ryan is to this decade.

My older son has mostly moved on to watching gamers, but my four-year-old has found his own joy in watching Ryan’s channel.

And, I know that grinds a lot of gears.

Parents, including myself, often disgruntling watched our children stare fascinated at Ryan, all the while calculating in our heads all the money he and his family earn from every single video.

I thought of how this poor child was being exploited, for some sort of bastardization of entertainment. This wasn’t acting, this wasn’t a skill.

Any parent with a cellphone camera could do this.

But, one moment changed my view on Ryan and his YouTube fame. Continue reading

It’s time to stop ‘boot-strapping’ parenthood

Scrolling through my Instagram feed the other day, I came across a video featuring a well-known motivational speaker, who this person is doesn’t matter, as the message shared is pretty much the same for the lot of them:

“I worked hard, came from nothing, did this all on my own, became successful, and you can too, if you just tried.”

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At face value, this is an encouraging sentiment, and provides us with that “can-do” attitude we need to achieve our dreams.

Yet. when we dig deeper, we find that success is never achieved in an isolated vacuum, and this message is dangerous no matter what you are pursuing, but it is especially true for parents — women and mothers in particular — who are taught we most work harder, better and smarter, with little or no help from society at large, because this is the American way.

Suck it up, pull up those proverbial “bootstraps,” and do what you gotta do.

This toxic message roots itself deep in our psyche and tells us that asking for help is a sign of weakness. Continue reading

Announcing the Blogging For Better Facebook page

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Last fall, I started a campaign known as Blogging for Better (#bloggingforbetter) as a way of raising awareness and money for various nonprofits. My dream was to bring together a network of bloggers, writers and influencers and use our collective platform to champion those smaller, grassroots organizations which don’t always have the time or money to engage on social media.

Since September, we have raised hundreds of dollars for foundations serving victims of sexual violence, homeless families, children in need of speech services, our veterans and much more.

Though, we still have a long way to go in terms of raising the amount of money I believe these organizations deserve, I am proud of how much this movement has grown over the past nine months.

To support our the efforts of Blogging For Better (#bloggingforbetter), I am excited to announce we are launching a public Facebook page. This page will serve as one-stop place to find all of the great content about our various nonprofits, as well as a home for inspirational stories and ways you can help your community.

In a time when social media can often leave us feeling sad, angry or defeated, Blogging For Better (#bloggingforbetter) will serve to bring some hope and good will to the digital world.

I invite you to like our page, comment on our posts, and share our content.  Also, please feel free to comment on this post with any suggestions or ideas on what type of stories you’d like to hear more about.

Here’s to blogging for better.

“The Sandlot” mom is spot on about free play

“The Sandlot” will always be a film dear to my heart. When the movie was released in 1993, I was 10 years old, around the same age as the rag-tag group of baseball-loving kids enjoying the freedom and joy of summer in the early 1960s.

Though I was never a boy, nor much of a baseball lover, and only knew about the 60s from my parents, every time I watched “The Sandlot,” I felt a deep sense of nostalgia for a simpler time when my biggest concern was the summer ending too fast.

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Even after I was long past those childhood days, my viewing of “The Sandlot” always centered on the action of the kids. They were the heart of the movie, and the kid in me loved to share in their triumphs and defeats. The adults were little more than supporting roles, serving as background for the real action.

Then, my husband and I decided to watch the movie with our two boys. Continue reading

No veteran should feel alone

On May 12, millions of Americans spent the day celebrating the mothers in their lives. Mother’s Day serves to remind us of all these women have done.

Later this month, Americans will celebrate another special group of people. A group, much like mothers, who put others before themselves. A group who paid the ultimate price for what they loved — their country.

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This Memorial Day, we will place flags on our windows; we will march in parades; we will cheer for those who serve, and bow our heads for those who died in the process. We will swell with patriotic pride.

But, what happens when the parades end, the flags come down, and everyone goes back to their lives?

Like mothers, veterans give their all for what they love. And, like mothers, veterans, all too often, get so little in return.

We praise those who serve, yet when the time comes to provide the services they need to cope with the toll of warfare, America falls short.

Our soldiers return from battle, suffering from the effects of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and are often left to fend for themselves. The resources they find may be limited or too expensive.

One foundation is working to change that. Continue reading

Sacred spaces should be safe spaces

As a Jew, I know antisemitism is always lurking. This feeling makes me wait a bit before revealing my religion to others. This feeling makes me glad to have an Anglo name on my birth certificate, as opposed to the Yiddish one I use during religious occasions. This feeling makes me fear how my children will be treated. This feeling makes me wonder, deep in the back of my mind, if anything might happen when I’m gathered with other Jews.

I try not to think about what might happen when I attend a prayer service or drop my child off at Hebrew School. I know the odds are good at will just be another, uneventful day. I’m sure that’s how the congregants at the Poway synagogue near San Diego felt when they gathered for Sabbath prayers.

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They weren’t thinking about being attacked for their religion. Sure, many probably experienced their fair share of antisemitism, there may even have been some Holocaust survivors in attendance, but on that day, they were not in the concentration camps of Nazi Germany, they were in America in a synagogue, many miles and many years from one of history’s darkest hours. They were there to worship, to praise G-d, to mourn the loss of loved ones and to share in the communal joy of being with other Jews. Continue reading