Maybe I'll Shower Today

I started my blog in 2013 out of a need to keep writing (my lifelong creative outlet) and to vent about my struggles as a new mother. While, I understood anything I put online wasn’t technically private, I did little to promote my work and gain an audience beyond my family and a few random followers. My writing was raw and more like what I would journal in a private notebook than something worthy of a larger audience. However, even from the beginning, I hesitated to reveal every personal detail.

While, I want my blog to be a place where I can be candid about my experiences as a mother, I also need to be mindful of my family and how my writing impacts their lives. I am sure, I have already written plenty which could embarrass my children, which is why, I will never write anything which mentions their real names, or share photos of them with clear shots of their faces. I do understand that because I myself am not anonymous, there are ways for people to find out who they are, but I at least can make it more challenging.

In this age of the YouTube star, however, I am not the only person who recognizes the publicity of children. My oldest adores these young stars, and wants to be on YouTube himself. As a parent, I need to understand this new world I never experienced as a child. I want my child to express himself, yet, at only five, I don’t think he fully comprehends what it means to be a public figure. I conceded to make a few videos just showing his hands — much like those popular toy opening videos. Hopefully, I can get them edited soon and have a few to share.

My husband is another person whose privacy I feel compelled to protect. His name will never be used in my blog, nor will I ever get too specific about his line of work. Even though, I chide him over his behavior on social media, I respect he does it on his forums, and in his space.

Beyond protecting names and other personal information, I want to respect my family in how I share information about our lives. As a mom blogger, it would be impossible for me not to allude to my children. However, I have learned it isn’t always what you write, but how you write about it.

If my son was struggling in school, for example, I would write about what actions I was taking to rectify the situation and what feelings I might have regarding education. I would never intentionally shame my child for having trouble.

Speaking of shaming, this is also a big no-no for me. I will never share a picture or story of bad behavior solely for the purpose of laughs. If I do share something, I want to show how everyone, myself included, has evolved and what we learned.

Much of my own vault has yet to be revealed. I am often guarded in my real life, sometimes even more than I am online, so I hold back. I don’t follow a set of rules when it comes to myself; instead, I let the words come out and decide when to hit publish.

Regardless of what I share, I want my words to resonate with my readers. I hope when I write about my struggles with bedtime, another parent might find comfort in knowing someone else is going through the same thing. I want my joys in the progress my children are making to remind others of their joys. Mostly, I want my readers to know their is someone out there who is just trying to figure it all out.

My fellow bloggers/writers, how much do you reveal?