I have thought about writing a parenting book for a long time, and toyed with various ideas for expressing my views.
The format I kept coming back to was poetry.
I have always enjoyed creating rhymes, and often find myself composing verse in my head. I felt compiling a bunch of short poems on the various aspects of motherhood would resonate best with my audience.
Giving birth seems to invite all sorts of opinions and input from everyone from close family to complete strangers. Here are some of the more common phrases new moms hear, and why they are problematic.
I breastfed both my children for about two years each (both directly from my breast and via pumped milk in bottles). I loved the bond nursing built between myself and my kids, and I am proud of myself for being able to do it for as long as I did. However, just because breastfeeding was right for me, doesn’t make it right for all mothers.
All who want to breastfeed should be supported in every way possible. However, many new moms are unable or prefer not to breastfeed, and need support as well. Breast milk is truly amazing, no debate there. However, breast milk is not the only way to feed a baby. Breast milk may be remarkable, but what’s more remarkable is a mom who is supported in her choices.
Continue readingMy baby doesn’t belong in the NICU.
At least, that’s what I thought while I held my seven-pound, full-term newborn in a room surrounded by tiny preemies tucked away in incubators, fighting to survive.
My baby doesn’t belong.
Or, maybe, I don’t belong.
My NICU experience was fraction of the time other parents endure. I came to the hospital with a baby born under emergency conditions and left two days later with a healthy child. This is not a typical NICU story, and I often feel wrong putting myself in that club.
I have friends whose children spent weeks, even months in the hospital, their contact with their precious babies reduced to supervised hours and minimal privacy. I have friends who spent days watching their tiny miracles give their all to survive, only to succumb to the will of G-d. I witnessed other parents during my visits to the NICU, whose bravery never wavered in the face of uncertainty.
Even though, my child wasn’t in the NICU for long. The time I spent with him there taught me just how valuable a caring and supportive environment can be for both newborns and parents. As I sat there in that uncomfortable hospital chair, awkwardly trying to nurse my child without detaching the numerous wires affixed to his body, I listened to the sounds of nurses tirelessly rushing from incubator to incubator, checking vitals and comforting bewildered parents. Because I was able to spend time with my child alone, I had the unique opportunity to observe other families and empathize with their hopes, fears and dreams.
Because I (article author) was able to spend time with my child alone, I had the unique opportunity to observe other families and empathize with their hopes, fears and dreams.
One common connection between all NICU families, as this immense feeling of gratitude. Even those who’ve experienced the greatest of loss, still find meaning and purpose in the midst of tragedy. These parents are an inspiration and a reminder how hope can shine through the darkest of moments.
One such mother is Stacey Skrysak, a journalist and writer who, along with her husband Ryan founded Triple Heart Foundation in honor of their premature triplets, Peyton, Parker and Abby. Born in 2013 at just a little more than 22 weeks gestation, only Peyton survived, with Abby passing shortly after birth and Parker passing in the NICU at nearly two months old. Continue reading